A Shout Out

When you go out for a run, for some reason people like to shout ‘encouraging’ words to you.
I’m sure now and then they are coming from a good place. But the majority of us have had to put up with some ‘witty’ comments.

Here are some I have come across over the years:

Constructive Criticism?

“Get those knees up!”
Is this coming from an experienced coach cycling alongside you with an old school megaphone pressed against his lips?
On closer inspection when I look around it’s a bloke sitting at a bus stop, more KFC than LSR.
But I’ll take his comments on board.

Niceties

These are usually said by polite and often elderly people “Good morning”, “Lovely Day”, “Looking good” or my favourite “That’s it!”
To make sure I’m polite, I smile and won’t spit until they are around 50 metres away (wind dependent)

Singing

Doesn’t happen very often, but last week when I was out on a lunchtime run a man saw me approaching and started singing the Spencer Davis Group smash hit ‘Keep On Running’.
He had a lovely voice and I did contemplate jogging on the spot next to him as we gave each other admiring glances.
But I only get an hour for lunch and I noticed he had a stammer.
I could have been there for quite a while.
Has anyone seen Gareth Gates lately?

Tom Hanks

“Run Forrest, run!”
When I first heard this I thought “Ooh that’s clever, I get it. It’s because he runs a lot. Very good. Bravo”

Then “Run Forrest, run!”
Excellent, but I’ve just heard that.

Again “Run Forrest, run!”
Oh dear.

Once more “Run Forrest, run!”
Please stop it.

Why just use that Tom Hanks film?

“Wilson!” (Taken from Castaway)
Admittedly, this only works if your name’s Wilson.

But what about a pavement turned into one long piano, like that one from the film Big.
I’d do a few repeats up and down that road.

Anyway when people shout at you. Just tell yourself ‘Life’s a box of chocolates’ and you’ve burnt enough calories to eat as many as you want.

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